3/11/09 Turning To Cartoons For Project Advice Since 1980

I thought you might want to see some pictures of my mighty mighty roof project from the other day. If you scroll through them really quickly, it looks like the roof magically does itself (okay not really, but I was curious to see how many of you would try it anyway).

I must say, I really had a pretty good time with the whole thing. There's something to be said about the working with your hands in the sunshine, perched on top of your roof and overlooking the neighborhood. It's very liberating. Plus, there's a certain forbidden element to it that makes me feel daring and adventuresome. Like, look at me people! You're way down there, and I'm way up here! On my roof! Where normal people do not dare to tread, but I, fearless DIYer that I am, boldly stand, brandishing my hammer and sashaying around with my very stylish little tool belt.

Eat your heart out, Bob Vila.

Anyway, without further ado, my roofing adventure, in pictorial form:

Here's my ugly plastic corrugated roof, pre-makeover. I'm sure it was very pretty and clear and bright when the previous owners put it up, but in the past few years it has gotten horribly yellowed and stained and trashy. So it had to go. Immediately. When I informed Tony of this, he sighed emphatically. It sounded a lot like what Ricky does when he finds out about one of Lucy's harebrained schemes. As punishment, I told him that he was not allowed to participate AT ALL in Roof Makeover 2009. That'll teach 'im.

Here's my corrugated plastic in a million pieces after I ripped it up and gleefully tossed it off the roof. Then I stood over it with my hands on my hips and roared in triumph. Destruction makes me feel powerful. I'm starting to get why men like monster truck rallies.

Here's the roof with the plywood pieces going on. I pushed each one onto the roof all by myself using a sophisticated system of levers, brute strength, and creative swearing.

Here's a quick celebratory shot of me after I managed to get all the plywood up and nailed into place. Note that I'm still sporting the triumphant Captain America pose.*

*And no, that's not a pot belly- the jacket has a front pocket where I was keeping my tape measure, water bottle, and cell phone (in case I accidentally fell off the roof. It saves time when you don't have to drag your broken body to the phone inside the house to call the paramedics).

Here's the roof with the first roll of tar paper, also known as roofing felt, also known as roofing paper. (I swear, have you ever heard of so many names for one thing? It's like it thinks it's John Cougar Mellencamp or something). Side note: when this stuff gets warm, it gets sticky. It's kind of like having a movie theater floor on your roof, but without all the popcorn.

Here's the roof all covered in tar paper and with the first row of shingles put on. Surprisingly, the whole shingle thing goes on pretty easily. It's a bit like laying wood flooring, but without the snap-n-groove bit. Just line it up and nail it down. I read up on the basic instructions here, and just went to town. Once you get your rhythm, you'd be surprised how quickly it goes.

Tony came out to monitor the progress when I was halfway through the shingles. I know I said that he wasn't allowed to play Bob the Builder with me, but you'll be happy to know that I relented and let him hammer the last five or six rows of shingles. (It's important to let men feel like they're helping). I lined them up, and he hammered them in. And this is the finished product. One beautiful new roof, which will not only do a better job of keeping my screened-in porch nice and dry, but also ties it in to the rest of the house so it looks like it belongs there and wasn't just an afterthought.

So there it is. And in case you are thinking of roofing something yourself but can't seem to drum up the courage, let me tell you, it's easy-peasy.

In the immortal words of Bob the Builder...Can you do it? Yes you can!