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5/5/10
Table Talk

The American Cancer Society's Relay for Life had their Trash to Treasure garage sale this weekend, and because I'm a helpful sort, I volunteered to load up Tony's truck and be official treasure transporter over to the church where the sale was taking place. They had a great turnout and ended up raising about $4600.00, which exceeded their goal of $4000.00 from last year. Which is, you know, bad for cancer, but awesome for the rest of us.

What's also awesome is that even though I had every intention of only dropping off, I happened to spy with my little eye a most bee-uuuu-ti-ful glass and metal table with matching chairs over in the corner. (Okay, so it wasn't quite bee-uuuu-ti-ful yet, but it had potential. And there's nothing I love more than potential). And wouldn't you know that I had just very recently decided that we needed a new kitchen table set? Specifically a glass and metal one? One veeeery similar to that one over in the corner, waiting to go to a good home?

(I must admit that I do not usually shop at garage/yard/rummage sales because who has room for other people's junk with all my own junk sitting around? That and Tony tends to frown on all of my "potential objects with potential". But it doesn't count as junk if you were already planning to buy one anyway, right? Right?)

And wouldn't you know it? Just as soon as I finished unpacking my last truck load, that very same table and chair set jumped into the back of my truck and begged to go home with me. (Oh Interpeeps, I got it for a song. A song I tell ya. Truthfully, I probably could have gotten it for half a song, but it was for a good cause, and I figured that ripping off the American Cancer Society would be wicked bad karma, so I paid them a song's worth and then my table and I went tearing out of there before rival potential-spotters could catch on and start a bidding war).

So now I am the proud owner of an ugly table and chairs, albeit with potential, which is what I tried to tell Tony when I arrived home and he was all, "What the heck is this!?" Actually, it isn't really that bad. It just needs new paint and upholstery. So that's exactly what I did.

Well, tried to do anyway.

Sometimes when I see things, I know exactly what I want it to look like. Other times, the image is more fuzzy, and I have to just jump in and follow my gut. This was one of those gut times. So I started with a shiny aluminum (or as the British say it, awl-you-mini-uhm) spray paint because I have a dark blue wall as the backdrop of the kitchen, and I thought silver would really pop against it. And I painted, and I painted, and it did pop all right, but I didn't love it. Honestly, it looked more like one of those folding aluminum beach chairs (which, while I love the beach, wasn't really a look I was going for in the kitchen).

So then I started over with a lovely satin nickel paint to cut the shine somewhat. And I sprayed and sprayed and sprayed, but it still wasn't quite right. The sheen was right, but the color was wrong. Plus when I showed it to Tony, he said it looked like "old people". (Not sure what that means exactly, but as "old people" is not exactly the motif I was shooting for, it was back to the store for more spray paint).

This time I called my mom over to ponder the great mysteries of spray paint, and eventually we settled on a dark dark metallic-y black that I am calling graphite. And we sprayed and sprayed and sprayed, and FINALLY I was like, "This is what I'm talking about!"

Of course, as is the way with 80 bajillion different cans of spray paint, by the time everything was said and done, I had painted not only the table and chairs but the cardboard I had the furniture resting on, the floor of the garage, three fingers, half of my right foot, my jeans, the end of my hair (not so much spray painted as just drug through wet paint as I was leaning over the table), and the inside of my lungs...which just goes to prove that you really aren't supposed to breathe that stuff.

And then I repeated it all again three more times.

Speaking of my gilded lungs, they aren't kidding about using that stuff in a well ventilated place. I had the garage door open, but apparently it wasn't enough because when I first started spraying, I was thinking things like, the leaf detail on the table is really intricate. When I finished, I was thinking, "That design in the middle looks like sperm getting together for a meeting...I wonder what they're talking about?"

Oh braincells. How I miss you. And how I wish that every time I sit down to dinner now, I'm not going to be thinking about sperm pow-wows.

I also recovered the seat cushions. The cushion itself was still in really good shape, but the fabric covering had definitely seen better days. No problem. I just channeled my inner decorator and ended up with a neutral tan fabric that is popular in my house because it does an excellent job of hiding cat hair. (With our brood, cat hair is a given. Therefore all out furniture was specifically picked out to blend with cat hair...sad, but practical). A couple of hits with a staple gun, and viola! new chairs.The glass top was in pretty much perfect shape already, so all I had to do with it was just wipe it down with some glass cleaner.

And there you have it. A new kitchen table and chairs. And it came out really really well if I do say so myself. I'm just tickled graphite about it. I invite you all over to sit and brunch with me at my pretty new table.
Of course, with all the spray paint that I've inhaled over the past 4 days, I'm probably a shoo-in for lung cancer, so hopefully buying this set helps the Relay for Life find a cure soon.