9/13/07 Feeding The Starving Artist

Ya'll, I'm going to share something with you, but you have to promise not to snicker. I painted a picture. Not a great picture, but an okay one, and considering that I'm not an artist and have had no formal training, it's not too bad. I wasn't even going to mention this, but then the Seester posted her fan-tabulous pumpkin creation, and I thought, "How inspiring! What artsy-craftsy thing have I done lately?" Besides, I think only close friends and family read this anyway, and you're required by law to like it because, you know, you're friends and family. That's just what you do. But if by chance you're not family, or worse, you happen to be a real live artist, you may want to turn away now.

Okay, here it is:

I just painted it on a whim one day with stuff I had around the house. It's not a super-duper artistic masterpiece worthy of the Louvre, but it's good enough for my guest bedroom, and if you're just looking for guest bedroom art, let this stand as a testament that you too can paint something yourself. The picture is based on Monet's water lilies, but not done in an Impressionistic style, because I just don't "dab" very well. (I don't think Monet will mind that I ripped him off). I put together a 4x6 frame using 1x2 boards, which I covered with cotton fabric out of Wal-mart's $1 fabric bin. I didn't prime it, I just stretched it tight and staple-gunned it. (Gasp in horror, genuine artists!) Then I painted it using left over house paints and spray paints that I had in my garage, and foam brushes (oh yes!) because you can get a bag of 12 in various sizes for $1.98. This whole deal cost me approximately $8, and better, I had a good time with it. I painted it out on my driveway, and it took me two afternoons. More than a few tiny ants tried to crawl across it and got stuck in the paint, but Monet painted his outside too, so I'm sure a detailed examination of his work will show insect carcasses in his landscapes too. (Plus I covered them with more paint, so you can hardly tell that they're in there).

It turns out that clouds are harder than I thought, and the Lily pads are probably the size of dinner plates (proportion-smortion), but it has sentimental value to me...much like a first grader's picture on the fridge, only mine is 6 feet long and torturing my overnight guests. (I know you're thinking twice before staying with me now, aren't you?) But it's the thought that counts blah, blah, blah, so if you've ever had the desire to dabble around in paint but are afraid to because you aren't an "artist", go for it anyway. Then post it on the Internet for the whole world to mock admire, because it gives real artists job security.

And I'm all about helping people with feeling secure in their jobs.