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10/4/10
The List

You know how you're in the house, doing whatever, and you realize that you're almost out of X product that you were doing the whatever with, and you're all, "We need some more of this. I need to write this down on the official Wal-marts list", but the list for the Mart of Wal is all the way in the other room so you're like, "Honey? Remind me to pick up some more X next time we're at Walmart" and he's all "Okay!" but you know he won't because he said it without ever taking his eyes off of the football game on TV so you know it went in one ear and out the other? And then later you ARE in the same room with Wal-mart list and you can't for the life of you remember what X was, even though you can remember that you need SOS pot scrubbing pads and more deodorant, although you already wrote those two down and you know, just KNOW that there was a third mystery thing? And you're like, "Honey? What was that thing that I said to remember?" and he's like, "SOS pads!" and you're like, "No. That wasn't it. You told me that we were out of SOS pads. What was the thing I told you?" and he's like, "Ummmmm. SOS pads?" so that's no help there. And for the entire rest of the day, the ghost of product X bugs you, taunting you from the very corner of your mind, until about 3am when you rocket out of a deep sleep and sit straight up in bed and shout "Febreeze Upholstery Spray!" at the top of your lungs, probably waking the neighbors, but who cares about them really since more than once their doofus teen-aged son has come home in the wee hours of the morning without his house key and awakened you with all his infernal door banging? And anyway, this is a moment because the prodigal brain has returned and brought the elusive Product X with it! It's all so clear now! You can remember anything! And you must share this triumph, so in all of your excitement you lean over and shake your dear sleeping list-forgetting husband and whisper "Febreeze!" in his ear so that he too can marvel at your amazing mental recall, only instead of celebrating with you properly, his way of marking this momentous occasion is apparently to just roll over in his sleep and murmur, "And SOS pads. Don't forget those".